Belgians & Chocolate

It’s been an exciting week for me and a very busy one. 

 

First I need to clear my conscience. I have to confess to buying a bar of Lindt dark chocolate full of yummy, intensely orange bits. Not a small bar mind you but a large £1.50 bar. I came home with it on Wednesday afternoon plus a hot, barbequed chicken from our local supermarket. I’d called in on the way back from school to buy a couple of things we needed and I had a complete breakdown of common sense and into my basket went the chocolate. I got home and devoured half the chicken with a few tomatoes, without even sitting down.

 

Then it was time to take Harper to the Vet’s. I was worried about what was going to be said. I knew he was showing classic signs of dog senility but I didn’t know if anything could be done for him. One thing for certain was that something had to be done, he’d woken us at four that morning and I just don’t get back to sleep afterwards. Even if I did, he would only allow about half an hour before he starts crying again.

 

Anthony, our Vet, is very good. We started going to him when Catherine worked there as an assistant/receptionist. All Vets should be like him, no nonsense, explains everything, gives you the options and supports you in whatever decision you have to make. He advised some tablets, which are actually anti depressants, (for the dog, not me!!!) one dose a day. The blurb on them said to try for 2 months and if nothing happened after then, to discontinue. He said that’s rubbish for a start, we would know in a few days if they would work, so just gave me ten days worth, as he didn’t want to waste my money.

 

I came home, relieved and hopeful and then set about eating the whole bar of chocolate, whilst catching up with my emails. The good thing is, after a month of taking Oregano Oil capsules, my body seems to have got back into a more normal state and I didn’t get any palpitations after my binge eating.

 

One definite, I will not now be taking antibiotics unless my life depends on it, it has been very sobering over the last few months to realise how over-prescribing them has almost ruined my life.

 

Whilst not wanting to go on about it too much, it has been a huge discovery for me to realise that the palpitations and shortness of breath, which were diagnosed as panic attacks, are actually a reaction to sugar and starch. This is caused by the rampant Candida I get after having two courses of antibiotics, back to back, when I have had a really bad ear/chest/sinus infection.

 

The two times in my life I have ended up on Valium and Anti-depressants have been after bronchial pneumonia and a really nasty bout of flu. I now feel a much stronger person, as I know what has caused these difficulties in my life. As I spent most of my childhood on Penicillin, it’s no wonder I was considered a problem child, if I’m honest I do feel bitter about the life I didn’t have and the fact that the tablets that were supposed to be helping me actually made me ill. Anyway, as the kids at school like to say ‘Get over it!’ So I will, no use crying over spilt milk.

     

 

Harper had his first tablet that evening. We’ve had him in our bedroom since the crying got really bad and he stayed there that night, as we didn’t know if there would be any improvement.

 

They worked, it was brilliant……… well it would have been……..

 

At 4 am Mike woke and wanted the loo. On his way out of the bedroom, he kicked over the dog’s water dish. Large dish, lots of water! He had to get a bath towel to mop it up. Then he had to go and refill the water dish. On returning to bed he obviously wanted to test the effect of the tablet and fell over the dog. Harper just moved and went straight back to sleep, unfortunately, I didn’t. I’m now considering some form of medication for Mike.

 

Thursday night we put Harper downstairs, in the doorway to the sitting room. I asked Mike to put his food and water bowl in the hall. Mike decided to put them right next to the dog’s bed, so he wouldn’t have to go far if he wanted anything. The result of that was, Harper knocked his water bowl over. But last night was uneventful and we slept until 6.30, the first time in months. I hope we can continue like this.

    

 

I’ve been corresponding, by email, all week with two newly discovered relatives from my Welsh/Belgian line. I have always been intrigued by the idea of a Belgian great great grandfather, who I imagined to be dark haired and good looking. I was despairing of ever finding a photo of him; he was born in 1852 and died in 1891. My mother had seen a large photo of him when she was a child but no one knew where that had gone.  One of these new relatives said she had a photo of Paul and I was over the moon to receive a copy of it this week. I have to write up a family history for all the relatives I have found, which is keeping me busy, their number increases weekly at present.

 

 

 

This is Paul, we think, with his eldest son Edward. When I first saw it, I felt, 'Oh! It's you' He looks just like I imagined, it was as if I had always known what he looked like.

 

Little Edward died in his 20’s from TB, as did a number of my ancestors. One 3 x great grandfather died at 29 from Cholera. On my farming side, they all live into their 70’s but many of the manual, furnacemen died very young.

 

   

 

 

What a fuss at school this week! I was sitting in the classroom working on Tuesday lunchtime and thought I could smell cigarettes. In my innocence, I dismissed the thought and carried on. Then one of the dinner ladies walked by the door to the girl’s toilets and dashed inside. Sure enough, there was a very strong smell of smoke.

 

Detective George is now on the case! I went found the cloakroom sniffing the bags of girls I had seen go into the toilet. Sure enough, a prime suspect’s bag had a very strong smell. We had a peep inside and there were two, part smoked, roll-ups! This girl is ten years old and she had been coming into school fifteen minutes late, over the last few mornings, with no good explanation. Two other girls had been found to be involved. Parents were called in and there was a general weeping, wailing and gnashing of teeth. I’d like to think we’ve nipped it in the bud but, probably not.

 

  

 

Other things that happened this week. I have been volunteered to put on a Birthday Party for my sister in law in early July. I don’t mind but it could have come at a better time with my trip to Germany coming up and the Big Family Picnic at the end of June. Still, no doubt I will cope and she deserves it, as life has been very difficult for her over the last few years.

 

Simon and Tori have come for the weekend, I actually got 24 hours notice this time. They are going to Cardiff on Sunday for the final in the playoffs for a place in the Premiership. If they win, they will be taking my team’s place (West Bromwich Albion).

 

My cousin came over yesterday, with some old family documents he is giving to me, as I am now officially the Harper family historian and archivist. He wanted to see how I do my research on the computer and was amazed when I was able to trace his father’s line back to 1861 and discovered his 3x great grandfather was born in Portsmouth in 1814. He thought all his paternal line had been born in Leicestershire. We spent a lovely time together and were both shocked to find it was 7pm when he got up to leave.

 

My biggest laugh of the week was from my friend Catherine, who recently moved to France. She likes to read my Journal, as a way of keeping up with what’s happening here. She was quite excited about the unusual, sideways flying, hot air balloon in last week’s entry and was showing it to her work mates, until they pointed out what an idiot she was and it was simply a photo on its side. Never mind Catherine it gave us both a good laugh. Hope to see you for a decent cheese and wine session here soon.

 

My Catherine is doing well, according to her doctor but is feeling tired. Three weeks on Tuesday I fly out there!

 

The garden is calling, I have lots of plants that need putting in , plus I haven't been on Pooh Patrol this week, so no doubt there will be some doggy deposits that need attending to !

 

              

Were does the time go?

 

The last few weeks have been manic with Catherine and Flo here, swapping places in the guest bedroom with Simon and Tori, or just Simon on his own as he goes up and down the country, like a whore’s drawers and in out of my house, like a fiddler’s elbow, with the result that I’ve been going round, like a blue arsed fly!

I love the English language.

 

Last Saturday saw us trying to get to a surprise 40th Birthday Party in the Cotswolds.

 

Well it was a BIG surprise to us we ever got there. For a start, never again will I try to get somewhere with the aid of directions taken from the Internet. What sort of sick pervert writes those programs for online map companies? They obviously aim to get the entire Nation lost. We could have used them as the ultimate deterrent in the event of Nazi invasion during WW2.

 

After we’d ripped those up and started asking people for directions, we thought we’d be all right. (Yes, after years of arguments, Mike now knows it is usually best to ask directions, rather than driving around aimlessly for hours)

 

Of course, I hadn’t then realised that in small Cotswold villages there are people who are really Aliens, who have taken on human form. Don’t go there. The countryside and houses are very pretty but OMG! The people are odd. If they have a fringe, beware! I think it may be hiding a third eye.

 

How can two seemingly  sensible young women live in a village ,less than a mile away and yet not be able to give us directions to Box village?

 

What on earth was wrong with the man that said “Go across the common and all that is to the left is Box, take the last turning on the right before you get to the pub, only you won’t know it’s the last turning until you have gone past it”..... Errr. ...Pardon?

 

If it were on the left, why would we want to turn right? I was starting to think we’d strayed into the set of ‘League of Gentlemen’. If anyone had asked if we were LOCAL, I would have been off like a shot.

 

We made it eventually but thought we had arrived after the ‘Birthday Boy’ as we were half an hour late; only he was another half hour later than us. They live there and they couldn’t find the place!

 

Best joke of the evening.

 

MFI are doing a new John Prescott flat pack range…..Two dodgy screws and the whole Cabinet falls apart.

 

Monday night saw us up at The Hawthorns for the West Bromwich Albion Player of the Year Dinner. As we’ve just been relegated I think that’s enough said about that.

 

The best bits of the evening for me were the food, which really was lovely and meeting former Baggies player ‘Super Bob’, Bob Taylor. It made my evening meeting him because he was such a top player. No. It had nothing at all to do with the fact he was the most attractive man I’ve been kissed by in a very long time (Mike excepted of course LOL)

 

Thursday night was a Charity Dinner at the Three Counties Showground, Malvern, it’s the annual Spring Gardening Show. Another excellent meal. (what about my diet!!!!)

 

Harper Dog is getting really senile, very quickly. He has to sleep in our bedroom now and even then he wakes us up at about 4.30am. He seems to think we should be up then and won’t be quiet until we give in and go downstairs. Then he falls asleep on the sitting room floor and we have to do the best we can with the day after about five hours sleep. I should have gone to another party tonight but after being awake so early and then several hours walking round  the Show at Malvern, I just couldn’t manage it.

 

I’ve found a new branch of my Welsh/Belgian family, which has been keeping me very busy and we all keep finding mysteries, but it’s great fun unravelling them. I can see me ending up writing a book with a possible title of, Sex in the Edwardian Era. I can’t believe what was going on!

 

One of these new relatives is called Marylou and she has given me her phone number. I've never known a Marylou before.  I  want to ring her up but I'm afraid I'll say Hello Marylou, and then carry on  singing 'Goodbye heart, sweet Marylou, I'm so in love with you'. I don't want her thinking I'm a nutter.

 

All of these activites and work have been liberally interspersed with bouts of gardening. It’s taken me at least 5 hours to weed the Herb Garden alone, which was compacted clay and full of bindweed, I broke one hand fork, the ground was so hard.

 

I am recording in photographs how the garden is developing over the weeks, the ones up top were taken on Wednesday, so things have got a bit further now. I have loads of plants bought at the Show to plant, I’m hoping this heavy, thundery, rain will soon stop, so I can get some in tomorrow. 

 

Only just over 4 weeks now until the baby is due!!!! 

 

Linda

 

PS I've just looked back to the photos in my entry for 23rd April, I can't believe the difference in such a short time.

Lady in Waiting

       

Today is the last full day of Catherine and Flo’s visit. I take them back to East Midlands Airport after school tomorrow. If all goes according to plan, I shall be taking the same trip six weeks later, to arrive in Germany the day before the planned delivery of my granddaughter. I say granddaughter, as that's what we have been told by the doctor who did the scans but there is always the possibility of a mistake. I hope not for Catherine’s sake, as she really wants a girl, it will require some adjusting of her ideas if she turns out to be a he. Although she has now reached the stage of wanting it out, whatever it is.

 

It’s an agile little thing and has been turning itself around over the last few days, I well remember the mixed feelings of fascination and discomfort, when arms, legs, bottom and head, would all be trying to put in an appearance through anywhere but the conventional route. I was convinced Simon broke one of my ribs!     

      

    

 

This is one of my favourite pictures of Catherine with Simon ,when he was just two weeks old. Catherine should be very grateful she is not having one this size! She was almost 3 years old when this was taken. I have to say she and Simon were not usually this friendly, it was only a few weeks later that I caught her trying to hide him, as she didn't want him with us anymore. I have to say there were timesI agreed with that sentiment, as he was the worst baby for crying that you could imagine. I even considered putting him in the garden shed some nights!

             

 

Time passes so quickly and she is soon to have a child of her own. Flo can’t wait for the baby to  come out to play and the new flat they have moved to will be a wonderful place for a child to grow up. I shall have to get some photos when I am over there, I’ve seen it on a video. They are right on the edge of town, their balcony overlooks fields and mountains. Their next-door ‘neigh’ bours, are ponies and she will have plenty of safe space to run around.

 

     

 

Here she is, collapsed, after the barbeque on Saturday. She looks like she ate all the pies!

(Only kidding!)

 

 

   

 

 

Yesterday, we went to an 'Open Garden' under the National Garden Scheme and here she is amongst the tulips. I hope it's going to be roses all the way for her but no doubt there will be times when she is tested and things don't go according to plan. I just hope she has the strength to cope with whatever life throws at her and in the words of Chunkichick, I hope it's more Carp than Crap, that comes in her direction.

 

             

 

Love you Catherine.

 

Mum x x x.

 

Thanks to SazzyCreationz for the lovely graphic.

 

 

 

George Mansions Hotel

I decided that, as The Queen has a Birthday Portrait done each year, I would have one also. 

 

          

This picture has been specially chosen, as it was taken in the week of my birthday and I found something to be taken alongside, which actually makes me look young and small! The tree is to be found in the churchyard at Much Marcle, Gloucestershire and is about 1500 years old.

 

What a thought that is! Imagine what periods of history it has lived through. It started life circa 500AD, which I think was classed as the Dark Ages when I was at school and it has already lived through 300 times my present life span. Amazing.

 

Sunday evening brought a phone call in the continuing saga of my accident-prone stepfamily. My mother, having married into it, obviously doesn’t want to be left out, as she has now started hurling herself to the ground in car parks and getting carted off to hospital. My stepfather has fallen downstairs twice since Christmas and my stepbrother almost died in a car accident the summer before last and is only just really getting over it.

 

This week it was the turn of my step niece, who competes in Show Jumping around the country. On Sunday her horse somersaulted, whilst taking a jump and landed on Emma 2 (Not to be confused with my niece Emma 1, who is in Australia at present) Emma 2 has ended up with a fractured pelvis, in no less than 5 places. I hope she makes a speedy recovery and is soon up and around.

 

Simon and Tori stayed with us until Tuesday and then they both went back to work. Tori to London and Simon, to Faslane.

 

Simon had to have a couple of days in the simulator, where they pretend things are going horribly wrong and he then has to put them right. He will be stopping off here tonight to say hello to his sister, before continuing on to Tori’s.

 

He has been told he is being drafted to another submarine that is having a refit, so will be based in Devon from June. That means he won’t have to go to sea again for at least 18 months.

 

Catherine and Flo arrived on Wednesday evening. They are both well but Catherine is looking quite different from the girl I saw get married in March, she’s put on a lot of weight, it’s a good job they decided not to wait for both of their brothers to return from overseas, or rather, in Simon’s case, underseas.

 

I have to keep typing this in snatched moments, it is now Saturday morning and I need to go shopping soon, as it’s 15 adults and a toddler for dinner tonight. The weather seems to be set fair, so I’m going to barbeque. Kebabs, burgers and sausages and a large bowl of Coronation Chicken, should please everyone. My sister has offered to do some salad, so that and a large bowl of buttered new potatoes means I can get some gardening done today and only an hour or two of food preparation.

 

I plan to take some photos of Catherine and will do an extra entry this week, as I want to record our last time together before she becomes a mother.

 

If all goes according to plan, the next time we will meet up is when I fly to Germany, the day before the baby is due to be delivered on the 14th June.

 

Catherine and I have just been discussing the oddities of my mother. She never washes her own hair, she goes to the hairdressers once a week and that’s it. She has straw hair. Catherine and I have smooth hair and if I don’t wash mine every day I wouldn’t dare go out. At 53 and going through the menopause, I still have greasy hair and the odd teenage spot!

 

Catherine can’t understand how my mother has never had to shave her legs in her life. Mum has dark hair, so you would expect it to be necessary. I, on the other hand, seem to have inherited my mother’s dark hair but my father’s hairy legs. How unfair is that!

I just said to Catherine I had legs like Godzilla, only I think I was in the wrong Monster Movie, I think I meant King Kong, although, I have to admit, they are looking a bit scaly this morning.

 

The new neighbours children are very sweet and keep talking to us when we are gardening. Lauren, aged 5, wanted to know from my husband, if two men got married, were they gay? Mike said, well they would probably be quite happy.

 

Must dash, Sainsbury's is calling.

 

Sailor's Return!

It’s been a long week!

 

Easter Monday started fair, the wind dropped and we decided to try to reclaim our garden. Every winter it gets out of control. The soil is very heavy clay, apart from the herbaceous border, which has pretty good soil, unfortunately it is backed by a Leylandii hedge, which takes a lot out of it, AND needs a death defying trim each spring. (Death defying because it is about eight feet high and on a slope)

 

Mike went up the stepladder, with the electric hedge trimmers, the steps slipped and he cut his wrist. No surprise there! Mike cannot go in the garden without acquiring some sort of injury. In fact he can’t do the washing up, any form of housework or decorating without acquiring some sort of injury. Can you see a pattern emerging here? After 22 years of marriage I have learnt to take no notice, unless he gets a doctors note, even then I will still require him to perform these duties, as I am not doing them all on my own.

 

We went to Homebase bought a different type of ladder and returned to do six hours of none stop gardening. At the end of the day, you could see a difference but there is an awful lot still to do. From midday until four there were people on the field at the bottom of the garden on motorbikes and quad bikes. The noise and fumes were unpleasant to say the least, I shall be keeping an eye on their activities and if necessary finding out if we can do anything. Our next-door neighbour was very upset about it.

 

Tuesday was another gardening day but we went off to a local garden centre first, to fetch some potting compost and bark chips. As my car is a hatchback we went in that and so I was driving. I’d gone a little way up the road, when I had to cut down a side street back to our house. Mike was a bit puzzled by this early return home. The reason for it being, I had just realised I’d gone out in my slippers! Now I know I’m getting old.

 

Another six hours of gardening and at least parts don’t look like a field now but still a lot to do.

 

Wednesday was lunch at the house of one of my colleagues, we had to take a dish each. As it was Queen’s 80th birthday on 21st April, the day after mine and I was born in Coronation Year, I did Coronation Chicken, I thought it was appropriate, the ladies all thought it was very good, which was a relief.

 

Thursday was my birthday and the day Simon was due back. His girlfriend and I spent much of the morning sending texts to each other. We were both worried that, as they were due in at 9.30am, he was in some sort of trouble, as we still hadn’t heard from him by lunchtime.

 

I finally got a call at 3pm. All was well he’d just been busy closing things down, or whatever it is they do on submarines. He sounded annoyingly alright considering he’d been shut away for three months and even said it felt like he’d only been away a couple of weeks. Tori and I had been driving ourselves mad with worry for the last few weeks. I was convinced he would have gone crazy with claustrophobia and thumped an officer but everything was fine.

 

This is the badge he gets to wear to denote that he is a submariner, not worth a lot in itself but a considerable amount in his pay packet.

 

Simon also passed all his Boards whilst on the trip, which means he is now a Petty Officer and gets to wear an Officer style uniform, (Fore & Aft) which I’m sure will suit him better than the bellbottoms (Square Rig), which I think looks rather camp.

Hello Sailor!

 

In his team of 5, the other four were all Scottish, as Simon isn’t, they nicknamed him Jock! Is that called irony?

 

We went out for a meal in the evening and  one the waiters heard Mike say it was my birthday. They made a big fuss of me and at the end the brought out a specially decorated  pudding, with a candle in the top. How polite to not try to guess my age and put the right number of candles in .

 

The newspapers this week were full of the fact that the Labour party paid £7,700 to have Cherie Blair’s hair done whilst hubby was electioneering. I have one thing to say to that………..You were robbed luv! Ask for a refund!

 

We were expecting my mother and Wilf over for dinner to day and in anticipation have defrosted half a cow to roast. Unfortunately Mum had started with a streaming cold this morning, so they won’t be coming. So it will just be Simon, Tori Mike and I. Anyone want a beef sandwich?

 

 

Abroad Thoughts From Home.

 

                         

                                     

          

With apologies to Robert Browning and Clifford T Ward for the title of this week's entry.

 

My one and only niece is travelling around the world and having a wonderful time. She's seen here with her friend Jaqui wearing dresses they had made in Thailand. They were wearing them in Singapore and went to Raffles Hotel for Singapore Slings. It’s hard to imagine that this young lady in the blue dress was once the hours old baby I held in my arms, just at the time Mike and I started going out. It makes me realise how long we have been together, more than 22 years now. Where did all that time go?

 

Catherine & Flo are settled into their flat and the kitchen is now fully installed. I asked her this week about getting the phone line in, so that we can chat via the Internet and Web cam. We had expected there could be a 2 week delay in get the line connected but I can’t believe that, in Germany of all places, in the town they live in all the lines are used up, so they have to wait for one to become available!!

 

It reminds me of the house we moved to when I was 10 years old, the phone there had a party line. What the heck was that about? We didn’t have an option, we had to share a line with the people over the road. The evenings I wanted to phone my friend Karen and picked up the phone and found they were on it. Then you would have to wait a decent interval before you picked it up again. Of course you could hear everything they were saying, so if you felt they had gone on too long you would stay on the line listening, just to make sure they got the message. Thank goodness we’ve moved on a bit.

 

You don’t get crossed lines any more. They were good fun.

 

Harper (dog) is waking us at 5.30 every morning now. We have to let him in the garden and then he insists he comes up on the bed with us. I’m now finding it almost impossible to get back to sleep. I think he’s getting really senile, as he has taken to screaming if he wants something. This is way above the whining that he was so good at, this is a full volume scream. It can mean anything, like open the door, where have you gone? I want a biscuit, why are you in the toilet? He doesn’t appear to be in any pain and his tail will be wagging while this is going on. I think he will have to see the vet again soon but I don’t want to until Simon is back home, just in case he needs an operation and doesn’t pull through. Although I don’t think there is anything really wrong, he’s just old, he will be 14 this year. Harper is Simon’s dog and he would be distraught if anything happened while he was away, which is another worry.

 

We expected Simon to be back on Good Friday but we haven’t had a letter confirming this, so we have no idea what is happening. How strange to think that when he last saw the world we were in the depths of winter and when he steps on land again he will find we are well into spring. (I wish someone would tell the weather that!)

 

I used a phrase this week that has been a joke in our family for about 18 years. It always brings back memories. My sister was married to a man, who was the son of Polish immigrants. His father Boleck (I think that’s how you spell it) was very dry, to the point of being dour. He was a dear little man but I don’t think he ever quite adjusted to England.

 

My sister made a birthday cake for her daughter’s birthday (4th I think) Boleck turned up at the end of the party and as the cake had already been cut she tried to describe to him what a wonderful creation it had been. She had been so proud of it. Boleck looked at the remains of the cake and said " I see you try your bestest" This still cracks us up now if one of us has had a go at something and it's turned into a bit of a pig's ear.............Like some of Mike's DIY attempts. 

 

I think Boleck had a rather pessimistic view on life. On another occasion, one Spring, my sister commented on the improving weather, saying "Soon be summer", he replied "Soon be Winter, soon be Christmas, soon be dead" What can you say to that?

 

There was an amazing story I read this morning. A Jack Russell had gone missing from his owner’s house in Kidderminster. The owner drove 500 miles around the area looking for his beloved dog. It turned out the dog had been with him all the time. Somehow he had climbed into the engine compartment of his car and got stuck. He ate the clutch cable, which I think is how they found out where he was. Apart from being hungry and thirsty, he was fine. Happy ending there but it does ask the question. How stupid was that dog? Why didn’t it make a noise?  

 

I’ve had news now that means we shouldn’t expect Simon back for a while yet. I feel very depressed about it, as there has been nothing official at all, we just know it won’t be this week. This has upset a number of plans and means his girlfriend is sitting alone with wasted leave that she is unable to alter. I feel so sorry for her, it’s her first experience of him being away at sea.

 

Just to depress myself a little more, as I now have it in my head there is a problem. I decided to have a look on The Royal Navy website. I came across this.

 

“As a result of operations in a hostile environment submarine losses may continue - in peace and war. We should respect the courage and sacrifice of the crews who operate boats in such a dangerous environment for long periods.”

I don’t want my son to be in a hostile environment, nor to make any sacrifice!

 

 

I certainly don’t want him to make a sacrifice for arrogant men in their thirties who sit in their flash cars with the kids, in the DISABLED spaces by the door at supermarkets. Just so wifey can go in and get his Lager without messing up her hair!

 

Wednesday I went for lunch with a friend I used to work with, I picked her up from her house and we went to a lovely old pub a short distance away, in a village with a green and duck pond. It was an absolute picture, there were people feeding the ducks and clumps of daffodils all around.

 

We both had Greek Salads in an attempt at healthy eating and ever mindful of trying to lose weight but the Feta cheesehad been marinated in olive oil. Although it was very nice I don’t think it was a very healthy option after all.  Neither was Sue’s large glass of white wine (was it Sue?). Although she was four pounds lighter after she paid for it.

 

We nearly had an incident on the way to the pub. I was doing about 50 mph on a straight, but rather narrow country road. There have been a number of fatalities along there and it’s not a road I feel comfortable doing 60 mph on.

 

A large 4x4 was behind me and obviously wanted to go faster. Suddenly I spotted a male Pheasant on the nearside grass verge. I just knew that instead of going the way he was facing, he was going to turn round and walk across in front of me. They really are the stupidest of birds.

 

I took my foot off the accelerator and my car slowed to a speed that I could do an emergency stop from. Sure enough, pea brain turned and started to stroll across the road. I then had to brake fairly sharply to avoid hitting him. Of course pea brain 2, travelling behind, had to brake really sharply because he was too close to me. He blew his horn. So I blew mine and gave him a cheery wave with a couple of fingers (I was taught road rage by a world class road rager, my mother!)

 

I know you shouldn’t endanger lives for the sake of a Pheasant but he should have been at a safe distance from me, then he wouldn’t have had a problem. I wonder if I can get a sticker for my back window saying " I slow down for Pheasants!"

 

Happy Easter, or do we call it Spring Festival now?

 

                 

Reflections

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

I seem to have entered a reflective period in my life. I don’t know if it’s the huge forthcoming change in my status in becoming a grandmother in a couple of months, but I think it’s more than that. I seem to be comparing the person I was, with the person I am now.

 

Forgotten memories keep flooding into my mind, so much so that I seem to have trouble paying attention to the here and now. I wonder if the change has anything to do with the alteration I made to my diet, after I found I had been suffering from an illness that makes starch & sugar virtually poison to me. Whatever the reason it’s interesting, as is the return of something resembling a waistline. If I could just manage to cut out wine completely I think I would see a huge difference. The problem with wine is the sugar and yeast content. Within minutes of having a sip the palpitations are back. Make mental note to self SAY NO!

 

 

Wednesday was probably the best weather we’ve had so far this year and Mike and I decided to spend the afternoon gardening. I was given a tray of Cowslips last summer but the ground was so dry and hard, I couldn’t plant them down in my little Wild Garden.

 

This week the soil was just right for working and I got them planted alongside the Primroses and Snakes Head Fritillaries. The Bluebells are showing now and the area is under some lovely Silver Birch trees, which give dappled shade in the summer but the leaves aren’t quite bursting through yet.

 

Abigail and Emily thought it was great entertainment and kept scratching around where I was digging, hoping for a nice juicy morsel to be uncovered.

 

Other trees are started to show leaf. Catherine’s Horse Chestnut, growing down by the brook, looks as if it is sprouting alien life forms at present. She grew the tree from a conker when she was about seven years old. For years it lived in a pot, so wasn’t able to grow much, then about four years ago I decided to plant it by the brook, in the hope that it will grow into a lasting legacy for later owners of this house. I hope we are still here for Catherine’s daughter to come and see the tree her mum grew.

 

I was hoping to hear Simon will be back in the country for Easter but we haven’t heard anything yet, so I’m not too hopeful now.

 

A friend sent me this picture with an Easter Greeting. I found it amusing but perhaps that’s my weird Black Country sense of humour.

 

       

   

It’s the Grand National this afternoon but I won’t be watching, or placing a bet. I used to do both but I can’t cope with the death of such beautiful creatures anymore. I’m sure more die now than used to.

 

About 20 years ago I worked for an Insurance Broker who specialised in ‘Bloodstock’

Insurance. We insured a horse called West Tip, he was with a local trainer. West Tip was very fancied to win the race in local circles and we had to increase his sum insured in time for the race. I was talking to the trainer’s wife the day before and she said if the going remained the same he would win. I put a bet on him and he won. I was very excited but I just don’t have the same feeling about horse racing now.

 

We went up to our local pub last night and shortly after we arrived Mike T came in. We really like Mike T, he is so funny, in a slightly manic way.

 

I don’t know why, but my Mike and Mike T have started this thing of laughing hysterically at each other when they meet up. Considering one is in his 60’s and the other his mid 40’s, it is a bit strange. I’m not sure what it’s all about but it usually amuses the other locals. Any strangers think they have come to a mad house.

 

When they had calmed down Mike T told us a joke, which he got completely wrong, so it took ages but I shall record the correct version here, as I can never remember jokes and I thought this one was funny.

 

Two pieces of Tarmac went into a bar and ordered drinks. One was a piece of Country Road Tarmac, the other was a piece of Motorway Tarmac. They got into an argument about their various properties and which was the harder of the two.

 

The Motorway Tarmac was insistent that he was the hardest because of all the juggernauts he had to carry.

 

Then a third piece of Tarmac came into the bar and ordered a drink. This new Tarmac was Red.

 

Motorway Tarmac ran outside. Country Tarmac followed and asked why he had run away, seeing as he thought he was harder than anyone else.

 

Motorway replied, “ I am hard but that Red Tarmac is a CyclePath!

 

The other joke I can remember is: -

 

How do you make a duck into a singer? Put him in the Microwave until his Bill Withers!

 

Our new neighbours blocked up the sewers, they are flushing things they shouldn’t down the toilet. So Thursday afternoon was spent unblocking it as they had caused a blockage just below our manhole inspection cover. What a smell! I can honestly say I know a bit more about their business than I wanted to!

 

The Dyson blew up yesterday, which follows the washing machine from last month and now my hairdryer sounds at half speed and keeps overheating. Why do these things all happen together?

 

I was amazed to find the replacement Dyson I wanted was available for a hundred pounds less from Tesco Online than it is from Argos or Curry’s, I shall remember that in future.

 

We broke up from school yesterday for two weeks. We now know that our Head Teacher was successful in getting the job of Head for the new school, when we merge with the infants in September.  I feel a little more confident now in keeping my job. She said on Thursday in a meeting with the other teaching assistants that I walk on water when it comes to computer skills, so I think I’m well in there.

 

As it is my birthday during the holidays I left school with a pile of cards, presents and flowers. It’s always nice to know you are appreciated.