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Worcester, Worcestershire, United Kingdom
Born in the year of the Coronation, I'm a Baby Boomer. In April of this year I decided I too would have a Diamond Jubilee celebration and completely change my life and that of my Husband's in the process

Saturday, 13 May 2006

Were does the time go?

 

The last few weeks have been manic with Catherine and Flo here, swapping places in the guest bedroom with Simon and Tori, or just Simon on his own as he goes up and down the country, like a whore’s drawers and in out of my house, like a fiddler’s elbow, with the result that I’ve been going round, like a blue arsed fly!

I love the English language.

 

Last Saturday saw us trying to get to a surprise 40th Birthday Party in the Cotswolds.

 

Well it was a BIG surprise to us we ever got there. For a start, never again will I try to get somewhere with the aid of directions taken from the Internet. What sort of sick pervert writes those programs for online map companies? They obviously aim to get the entire Nation lost. We could have used them as the ultimate deterrent in the event of Nazi invasion during WW2.

 

After we’d ripped those up and started asking people for directions, we thought we’d be all right. (Yes, after years of arguments, Mike now knows it is usually best to ask directions, rather than driving around aimlessly for hours)

 

Of course, I hadn’t then realised that in small Cotswold villages there are people who are really Aliens, who have taken on human form. Don’t go there. The countryside and houses are very pretty but OMG! The people are odd. If they have a fringe, beware! I think it may be hiding a third eye.

 

How can two seemingly  sensible young women live in a village ,less than a mile away and yet not be able to give us directions to Box village?

 

What on earth was wrong with the man that said “Go across the common and all that is to the left is Box, take the last turning on the right before you get to the pub, only you won’t know it’s the last turning until you have gone past it”..... Errr. ...Pardon?

 

If it were on the left, why would we want to turn right? I was starting to think we’d strayed into the set of ‘League of Gentlemen’. If anyone had asked if we were LOCAL, I would have been off like a shot.

 

We made it eventually but thought we had arrived after the ‘Birthday Boy’ as we were half an hour late; only he was another half hour later than us. They live there and they couldn’t find the place!

 

Best joke of the evening.

 

MFI are doing a new John Prescott flat pack range…..Two dodgy screws and the whole Cabinet falls apart.

 

Monday night saw us up at The Hawthorns for the West Bromwich Albion Player of the Year Dinner. As we’ve just been relegated I think that’s enough said about that.

 

The best bits of the evening for me were the food, which really was lovely and meeting former Baggies player ‘Super Bob’, Bob Taylor. It made my evening meeting him because he was such a top player. No. It had nothing at all to do with the fact he was the most attractive man I’ve been kissed by in a very long time (Mike excepted of course LOL)

 

Thursday night was a Charity Dinner at the Three Counties Showground, Malvern, it’s the annual Spring Gardening Show. Another excellent meal. (what about my diet!!!!)

 

Harper Dog is getting really senile, very quickly. He has to sleep in our bedroom now and even then he wakes us up at about 4.30am. He seems to think we should be up then and won’t be quiet until we give in and go downstairs. Then he falls asleep on the sitting room floor and we have to do the best we can with the day after about five hours sleep. I should have gone to another party tonight but after being awake so early and then several hours walking round  the Show at Malvern, I just couldn’t manage it.

 

I’ve found a new branch of my Welsh/Belgian family, which has been keeping me very busy and we all keep finding mysteries, but it’s great fun unravelling them. I can see me ending up writing a book with a possible title of, Sex in the Edwardian Era. I can’t believe what was going on!

 

One of these new relatives is called Marylou and she has given me her phone number. I've never known a Marylou before.  I  want to ring her up but I'm afraid I'll say Hello Marylou, and then carry on  singing 'Goodbye heart, sweet Marylou, I'm so in love with you'. I don't want her thinking I'm a nutter.

 

All of these activites and work have been liberally interspersed with bouts of gardening. It’s taken me at least 5 hours to weed the Herb Garden alone, which was compacted clay and full of bindweed, I broke one hand fork, the ground was so hard.

 

I am recording in photographs how the garden is developing over the weeks, the ones up top were taken on Wednesday, so things have got a bit further now. I have loads of plants bought at the Show to plant, I’m hoping this heavy, thundery, rain will soon stop, so I can get some in tomorrow. 

 

Only just over 4 weeks now until the baby is due!!!! 

 

Linda

 

PS I've just looked back to the photos in my entry for 23rd April, I can't believe the difference in such a short time.

12 comments:

wobblymoo said...

What a fantastic entry, made me laugh from start to finish. Blue arsed fly is the one we use here :o)

pricesc93 said...

Really enjoyed reading this entry, highly entertaining!! Looking forward to the next instalment and the new arrival! xx

jimbarton60 said...

Hi, once again,
Your 'stuff' really does me the power of good.  Written by a true 'diarist' or whatever the word is.  Nothing contrived...just as you think about it!  Take it or leave it!  I love it!  Keep going for the benefit of others.
I've up-dated mine recently and am working on another Chapter of J.B.'s Life & Times as my wife is out at a Craft Fair for the MS Society.  

Best wishes,
Jim

http://journals.aol.co.uk/jimbarton60/JBsLifeTimes

jckfrstross said...

Hi Linda :) thank you for visiting my journal:) a new grand baby woohoo :) i have added you to my alerts so i will be back

Deb

bigalf42 said...

Hi Linda,
A truly funny and entertaining entry; you never have a dull moment at your house do you? I liked the Prescott joke and the Marylou episode. Keep them coming

BigAlf42

http://journals.aol.co.uk/bigalf42/anythinggoes/

wrigleyrachey said...

Great reading Linda, so funny...I haven't been back long, wrote a journal and was reading what you have been up to, and we had strange woman giving us directions , is it the month of madness .lol
Rach.xxx

debbiewebb4465 said...

Hi Linda.....love your garden, and Abilgail and Emily ~ my favourite!! Laughed all the way through this entry ~ brilliant! And I can't believe it's only 4 weeks til the baby comes OMG you must be SO excited !!!
Can't wait to see more photo's.....I've done the same as you ~ took more photo's as we've done more, and it's grown unbelievably quickly! (the garden that is lol) Hope the sun keeps shining!
Lotsa love Debbie ~xxxxx~
http://journals.aol.com/debbiewebb4465/TheLifeTimesofanEssexGirl

wolfspirit458084 said...

You have a beautiful garden,...love your chicks.

bobandkate said...

That was such a funny story and so well told - I was giggling the whole way through - must be a sort of twilight zone out there in the English country side. What about Marylou? Let us know if you phone her. Great looking garden too, loved the pictures. Have a good week,
Kate.
http://journals.aol.co.uk/bobandkate/AnAnalysisofLife/

beckiepainton said...

I get lost in our town centre i get easily disorientated, id never go somewhere new on my own id never be seen again!!!One thing my nan says when it looks like its going to rain:"its dark over Will's mothers"I have no idea who Will or his mother is.Beckie.

wrigleyrachey said...

Hi again, I still haven't managed to get broadband, so pics appear very slowly~but what is Richard Branson doing above your house? lol...you have a lovely garden, love your chickens as well.
Rach.xxx

careychl said...

hi i found your entry realy funny i went to east malling in kent a few years ago and it was just the same, always the same 3 people sat at the bar in the local pub and they always turned round to eyeball you when you went in.love the chickens and your garden is sooo pretty     take care   sam  http://journals.aol.co.uk/careychl/bosombuddieswakefield